This morning, I crawled out of bed.. seriously feeling like hell. I threw on shoes, brushed my hair and teeth, washed my faced and in my sweats that I slept in headed to the hospital for my blood work. I am feeling particularly shitty and down. I have a shifty mood.. up and down and all around and I feel like a fucking guinea pig.. a very unsupported one at that. I am also very lethargic, unfocused and drained. I feel like a fucking space cadet on my medication. In addition, I have a side issue with severe headaches, for which I had a CAT scan for on Monday and I am waiting to hear about the results on for that. All in all, this was not one of my finer mornings, but like I said I made it out of bed.. in my PJ’s, but I made it out and to the hospital for my lab work.
After, I decided maybe I needed to stay outside for some fresh air and made a beeline for the coffee shop. Obviously, if I was going to do this, I was going to need to be caffeinated, so I got myself a coffee and a bagel, which I took to the park. I planted myself on a bench with my book. This bench is like 1 of 100 in the park. About 10 minutes into my delicious and otherwise quiet breakfast this girl shows up on the bench across from me with a stroller. I’m initially annoyed because, like I said, there’s like 100 benches in the park, but I go about my business and pay no attention. I look up again when these two drunk men walk by, and as I’m being more mindful I realize that she’s staring at me. Once we made eye contact she started talking to me from across the way, initially I think she had an interest in me, or so I gathered from later conversation. She came to sit with me, and we ended up having random conversation for over an hour. I found out all kinds of things about her, she’s much younger than I thought from my estimation, the baby wasn’t hers - she was babysitting, and she was getting ready to move away for school to play basketball. She also has issues with anxiety and depression like I do.. just things you’d never know by looking at her.. every idea I had in my head based on her appearance was incorrect. I wish I could remember her name, she was so nice.
I walked away from her with my day brightened. Honestly, I don’t really talk to strangers. I don’t really like most people. I don’t acknowledge people I don’t know.. or give them the time of day, I just kind of float around in my own little world.
Who knew a complete stranger could lift a part of my day like that? I guess, I’ll have to work on being so judgmental in the future.
